Homo Deskboundensis

I’m thinking these days I’m spending an awful load of time in front of this screen, and curved on the keyboard typing. That’s why my back hurts so badly lately and I have frequent absurd headaches. I feel a little unhealthy and crumbled, but isn’t that what every 21^st century person experiences?

At the same time I cannot stop. What I am doing alongside my macbook so much is working on my PRs. I have written and replied to more than 5oo e-mails these past week. That takes time. Also I’ve been blogging a lot.

And why is that that we blog?

For me I think it is a desperate need for human interaction. I have a few great friends, but not many. I can’t be bothered with fake superficial relationships. I find blogging to kind of stand in between the two extremes, because it allows you to express yourself with an endless group of individuals - and if you’re persistent enough even get to have someone read what you’re saying - but in the end only those actually interested in your endeavors will spend their time with you. That kind of makes their attachment real and they won't be fake and superficial unless fake and superficial is what you write for them.

Also blogging is helping me to expand my horizons. I get stimulated to write on a variety of different subjects. Having entered the blogosphere pushes me and compels me to read more, and I’m discovering a whole lot of people who actually share my interests and write amazing things about them. Travelling, cooking, fashion, photography, makeup, reviews, geekish stuff, building things from scratch with your bare hands, bedjumping, funhaving.

Nevertheless I should start adjusting the time I spend in front of computers to intertwine it better with the other activities in my life that I am kind of blatantly ignoring at the moment. After all I have no intention of becoming a professional blogger and the road I have to walk through in my line of work is steep, long and dirty. So it needs my devoted attention.

Speaking of which I will go back to my books.

Thank you for visiting my blog and sharing this wonderful time of my life with me!

This post was written to the sound of Norah Jones and Amy Winehouse. Lovely.

Nine layers

This morning I've indulged in the world of self-centerness and I've compiled a meme in which I talk about me, me and me. I decided to start with an easy, short one, just to see if I liked the subject matter. I have to say I had a nice time doing it.

I felt I hadn't really given any facts that would describe me to my readers since I started this blog, and I know I like to have somewhat of an idea of who my bloggers are when I read their ramblings, hence the experiment.

Thanks to Eleonora who inspired me to do it and on whose blog I found this specific meme.

As layers progress they carry more in depth information about me.

So read on and nice to meet you!

LAYER 1:

•                Name: Cristina, but you can call me Cricci

•                Birth date: September 14^th 1983

•                Birthplace: Roma Roma Roma

•                Current Location: As above, but I hope to change this answer in a little while

•                Eye Color: Extremely nuanced dark brown

•                Hair Color: Dark brown, but I enjoy a little splash of highlight every once in a while

•                Height: 1,69 m

•                Righty or Lefty: Right hand in writing, left leg in snowboarding, right foot in football playing (but I’m mastering the ambidextrous art in this particular field, so I can be invincible)

•                Zodiac Sign: Virgo

LAYER 2:

•                Your heritage: Some say my mom was born in Naples but you might want to keep it a secret

•                The shoes you wore today: Slippers, I’m home

•                Your weakness: Smiles

•                Your fears: Death mostly. Anything else is surmountable

•                Your perfect pizza: Tomato sauce, buffalo mozzarella and raw ham. Thick, tender and flaming hot

•                Goal you’d like to achieve: Serenity

LAYER 3:

•                Your most overused phrase on AIM: What?

•                Your first waking thoughts: Fuck it’s late

•                Your best physical feature: According to others there’s a lot, don’t mean to brag. According to me, well, that’s another story

•                Your most missed memory: Lunch at my grandma’s

LAYER 4:

•                Pepsi or Coke: I endure swallowing a glass of Coke only when I desperately need some digesting action

•                McDonald’s or Burger King: Oh yuck

•                Single or group dates: Are you kidding me? If a group is involved it’s not a date, it’s a night out

•                Adidas or Nike: Adidas, Originals

•                Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: I’m not very fond of iced tea, I stick with water. Still

•                Chocolate or vanilla: What’s vanilla?

•                Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee everyday, at least twice. Cappuccino in the nice, slow, indulging mornings, like Sundays

LAYER 5:

•                Smoke: Used to. Quit simply and without any effort when I became hypochondriac

•                Cuss: Ask my parents, they don’t want to be seen with me

•                Sing: Atrociously

•                Take a shower everyday: Every other day mostly, when I have practice. On the other days I wash just the important bits

•                Do you think you’ve been in love: I know I have

•                Want to go to college: No thanks, been there and thank God it’s over

•                Liked high school: Parts of it

•                Want to get married: Someday, but not a priority

•                Believe in yourself: Lately a whole lot

•                Get motion sickness: Anytime, anywhere, anyhow

•                Think you’re attractive: With tons of make-up, styled hair and a bag on my face yes. Just kidding!

•                Think you’re a health freak: Hell yes. You can refer to the first point of this layer

•                Get along with your parent(s): Sure, and it gets better everyday

•                Like thunderstorms: Kind of impartial to them

•                Play an instrument: I played the piano for a couple of years when I was 7, but then I understood I’m not made to sit down for long hours so I went to dance school and ditched Mozart

LAYER 6: In the past month…

•                Drank alcohol: Yes, couple of glasses of wine during night outs. I’m not a big elbow bender

•                Smoked: Nope

•                Done a drug: Nope

•                Made Out: Sadly nope

•                Gone on a date: Do you want to break me down?

•                Gone to the mall: Of course! I don’t function without shopping, especially when I don’t go on dates, more so when I don’t make out

•                Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No, but I’ve eaten entire boxes of other fat clustered things

•                Eaten sushi: Yes. I can’t imagine life without sushi

•                Been on stage: Yes. I’m an actress

•                Been dumped: Kind of

•                Gone skating: No. Haven’t gone in a while actually

•                Made homemade cookies: I made brownies!

•                Gone skinny dipping: No, never have, but oh so want to

•                Dyed your hair: Yes. My brother in law owns a salon and is the best hairdresser in Rome

•                Stolen Anything: No. I gave up that craft long ago

LAYER 7: Ever…

•                Played a game that required removal of clothing: Required kissing yes. Removal of clothing, not that I can remember

•                Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: More than once

•                Been caught “doing something”: Mmmm, not that I know of

•                Been called a tease: Just by my girlfriends, and just as a joke. Right?

•                Gotten beaten up: No

•                Shoplifted: Oh I have an enviable record. But it’s dated to the 90s

•                Changed who you were, in order to fit in: I used to do it a little when I was younger, but luckily I found out soon enough that it doesn’t serve you at all

LAYER 8:

•                Age you hope to be married: Like I said, it’s not a priority. But I hope to be in love again soon

•                Numbers and Names of Children: Zero, but my first girl might get the name Phoebe. Ain’t it cute?

•                Describe your Dream Wedding: I see a man I’m desperately in love with. Nothing else

•                How do you want to die: Gentle heart failure in the arms of the love of my life

•                Where you want to go to college: Nowhere

•                What do you want to do when you grow up: Great movies

•                What country would you most like to visit: Japan

LAYER 9:

•                Number of drugs taken illegally: Number as in types or times?

•                Number of people I could trust with my life: Four

•                Number of CDs that I own: A lot, but I don’t listen to them anymore, I’ve evolved

•                Number of piercings: Six altogether on the ears and belly button

•                Number of tattoos: Three

•                Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: Couple

•                Number of scars on my body: Some, I don’t know

•                Number of things in my past that I regret: None. Everything I did made me who I am

Now it’s you turn!

You can now look me up on the Internet Movie Database

Yes. Because I'm on it!

I'm so overwhelmed by everything that is happening to me these days. I cannot even put it into words.

Being on IMDb is one of those things I had been looking forward to for a long time, like it would mean that I had accomplished something.

It may be a small step - and just one tini tiny movie title - but it is something I can check out from the big fat book of things do in life.

√

And it feels GOOD!

This mind-blowing event provides me with a great opportunity to share with you however little knowledge I gathered from my experience.

Compromise always, prime importance in life, but never, ever settle down for less than you deserve.

Please come visit me frequently and feel right at home!

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm4108526

Meme

From the ominous Wikipedia:

A meme (pronounced /ˈmiːm/, rhyming with "cream") is a postulated unit of cultural ideas, symbols or practices, which can be transmitted from one mind to another through writing, speech, gestures, rituals or other imitable phenomena. (The word is a blend of "gene" and the Greek word μιμητισμός for "something imitated".) Supporters of the concept regard memes as cultural analogues to genes, in that they self-replicate and respond to selective pressures.

The British scientist Richard Dawkins coined the word "meme" in The Selfish Gene (1976) as a concept for discussion of evolutionary principles in explaining the spread of ideas and cultural phenomena. Examples of memes given in the book included melodies, catch-phrases, beliefs (notably religious beliefs), fashion, and the technology of building arches.

Meme-theorists contend that memes evolve by natural selection (in a manner analogous to that of biological evolution) through the processes of variation, mutation, competition, and inheritance influencing an individual meme's reproductive success. Memes spread through the behaviors that they generate in their hosts. Memes that propagate less prolifically may become extinct, while others may survive, spread, and (for better or for worse) mutate. Theorists point out that memes which replicate the most effectively spread best, and some memes may replicate effectively even when they prove detrimental to the welfare of their hosts.

I have decided today that I want to lend a hand to extinction verging memes at my own welfare's detrimental risk. I'll start working on that!

Marty McFly (still) is the man of my dreams

Is there something wrong with me? It’s Saturday night and I’ve been asked out by a few different groups of friends. I denied myself. Actually I was kinda scared that if they were going to invite me along more insistently I wouldn’t have been able to fend for my rights.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends. I’m an outgoing people’s person. But I’m just not that much into going out. Tonight for example I was perfectly contempt with staying at home with my parents in my PJs watching AS Roma play Genoa – and we won, eff them we won – while licking my fingers from a saucy mozzarella, tomatoes and raw ham pizza.

I went out with my girls this afternoon, we hung out, I got back at 8, so I’ve had my fair share of social interaction. I don’t feel compelled to get crazy late after dinner and sweat my ass off in cluttered, noisy clubs. I mean I like to let lose occasionally but it’s not my ideal timekiller. Am I missing out on something I will only be able to do at this stage of my life? That I have yet to figure out.

I usually spend most of my nights at football practice. Three times a week I get home at 11.30 pm, exhausted and hungry. To be honest with you when the opportunity presents itself to spend a whole evening at home, like during the weekend, I seize it!

Maybe I can make an exception if you’re taking me to a good movie, but otherwise I have fun minding my own business in my room. Taking care of my job’s public relations, reading my self-teaching books, catching up on films and tv, and writing this blog post.

No one went ahead in this business by waiting for occasions to rain on them. You have to work hard to succeed and sometimes this means homebound time. Personality is called that because it’s personal and not everybody will understand it. Well that is fine by me. Personality is the thing that is taking me places therefore I embrace it!

Then again I get these looks from people like “You’re staying in on a Saturday areyoucrazy?????” and I just don’t get them.

The interior of my house is so much fun. I have food, a macbook, a phone, adsl and tons of books, and that’s really all I need. Thanks to a couple of these in fact I did something I found EXTREMELY enjoyable today.

That is booking tickets to go see Back To The freaking Future back in a freaking CINEMA in ten freaking days!!!!

I waited 25 long years for this. And I’m going to finely taste every single second of it. Starting statim.

Now after that kind of screening, I find it would be a good time for me to go raise hell at some rhythmic ceremonial ritual, and that is exactly what I think I’ll do, but just because I won't be able to be here!!

In all seriousness these guys' initiative is plaudible. Joining terrific fun with a good cause is inspiring and jealous inducing. I would so want to join in. And there's a dress up contest for Doc's sake. I might cry...

Check them out at @weregoingback and weregoingback.com

Undercovers - Jailbreak

Here we go with the accent episode. No, the title is not “accents” but it might as well have been. Today we learn that not just Sam is good with Great Britain inflections, but so is the rest of the cast. Bravo!

Dublin, Ireland. I’m distracted. Ok, I will tell you the truth. Scottish and Irish accents arouse the bejizzle out of me so I don’t care what these guys are saying, I just want to see them naked. Anyhow something has been stolen, go figure.

And, after the first couple of minutes in a foreign prelude we are, like each week before, surprisingly catapulted to the Bloom Catering offices. I’m wondering if the main outline of the episodes will start changing as the show evolves. I fear not. Stupid sister is there at 7 am cooking. Oh God writers please do not start a storyline for her, that’ll be a serious waste of money and some very good shows are being cancelled for financial difficulties right about now, think about that. Anyway I will dismiss this nonsense quickly. She’s trying to kiss the Blooms’ black slick asses because she wants their secret secret-agents’ money and she wants it now. I’ll spare you the pain of watching and tell you straight, Sam will give it to her, but Steve, oh Steve is a human lie detector, and his detecting sensor is mounted on his perfect abs, so that’s why it works so well. In fact he doesn’t buy this charade for a second. And he knows he’s right. He knows it so well he publicly displays his superiority by stand-offishly biting a shiny apple. You work it pal!

Spy-wise Baldie joins the Blues Brothers and implies ONCE AGAIN that the Blooms have been reactivated for some shady purpose. You already said that, we are not deaf, and if we were deaf we’d have subtitles so please move on!! But before his stupid stint is over he has one more present for us and he refers to the Blooms as rusty ONE MORE TIME. Right after that though he admits they’re not unintelligent. That sweeps through my auditory canal like a breath of fresh air. At any rate Baldie goes on to inform our sexspionagers that the hot accent guy has actually stolen a hard drive from a CIA cargo hence the old ballad of info selling. You get the gist of it. The news is he was actually arrested but escaped prison by faking a seizure while blatantly wearing an obnoxious wig. Can’t these people just cast actors with long hair??

Abs and Sam are flown to the prison right away to get a lead on the escaped prisoner. They are all equipped with fake identities and, of course, fake accents. Once they get there they are informed that their supposed boss is already on the premises. Drum roll, scared faces, camera pans right and… There is Leo. Hello Leo. Yes, you smile like that and ratings will go UP!!!!

Sam scolds him about passing as chief inspector, a move that was not exactly what you would call inconspicuous. But Leo replies that “you can’t spell inconspicuous without conspicuous” and you can see there and then that Sam wants to rip his clothes off. And quite frankly, so do I. Leo states he’s there to help them get their spy legs back and you can see there and then that Steve wants to bite him alive. And quite frankly, so do I, especially the neck. Yummy. While the guys talk about a few magazines that were found in the cell, which Leo had to confiscate for research – PORN – Sam finds a teddy bear full of what I assume to be seizure inducing drugs. Unfortunately it’s not that obvious for them and they resort to calling Flunkman for analysis. He keeps saying “matey” and that’s the most annoying he’s ever been so I will ignore him completely.

The detecting sensor in Steve abs smells an affiliation between hot accent wigged guy and an Irish gang. So Flunkman, who apparently is pretty crafted at drawing (this doesn’t make you any better, stop hoping) replicates the famous gang’s tattoo on Steve’s neck so he can infiltrate. Meanwhile hot accent guy shaves his wig off and wears sunglasses, great disguise, just like Peter Parker’s.

Here’s right about when it happens, possible character developing. Just as he’d done with Steve a couple of weeks ago Leo asks Sam if she’d been honest with the real motives that made her leave the CIA. And, wait for it, she hasn’t! I spy with my little eye a lot of lies here people. Start using them for plot purposes!! We should be so lucky. In fact Steve ruins the party and everybody goes to work.

The group splits up. The humping bunnies go to the gang’s headquarters to investigate while Leo and Flunkman reach for hot accent guy’s ex wife and find out she has the same teddy bear that was found in the cell. She is therefore a suspect and this allows Leo to have sex with her to extract information. Unfortunately she has not much to say, but Leo is not too discouraged by that.

At the gang’s Steve manages to get the name of hot accent guy’s partner in crime and Flunkman pinpoints the location of his house. They go there but there is no sign of the suspect. Instead they find Leo. Info travel faster under the sheets. The abs cannot suffer this kind of slight so they engage in a verbal slam-down with their disguised nemesis. Sadly for Steve Leo has the best of it comparing himself to a cheetah on the African plains that will always be ahead of him until he gets his spy legs back, thus being able to close the gap, mind, not catch up to him. Whoa! The race is on! Once things start to interestingly swirl over to Leo’s sex life Flunkman sadly intrudes. He’s found a cell phone number that will track hot accent partner down at the first phone call he gets. So we sit around, waiting. While we enjoy this dull moment of idleness the apple sneaks back in. Nice to see you again Ruby!

Hot accent partner finally gets a call. It’s hot accent wigless guy asking for a meet up. A little chat among friends I suppose. Once they get there Wigless’ true colors actually shine through as a damn doublecrosser. Ouch. I feel there’s always a doublecross in these Undercovers plot but surprisingly they haven’t bored me yet. Anyway Wigless has Partner’s wife and he wants to start flying solo, meaning he doesn’t want to have Partner as a partner anymore. Oh he must be crushed. So Partner has to back off if he wants to have his wife back. Of course he does. Wife is let go and while slowly scarily walking toward Partner, she gets a freaking gun and shoots her husband out cold. Ouch. OUCH!

Our talented spies and some of their high heels get in a little too late, but they are so not “unintelligent” that they figure out the murder must have been Wigless’ fault. Flunkman of course has an answer to any question so we are lead the way to London, England by means of a nice swing melody. That’s where Wigless and Traitor Wife are at.

They are checked in a hotel under the name George Best (another piece of info courtesy of Leo’s sexual intercourse), the only thing missing is a room number. Flunkman gets hold of it using what he calls the reverse seduction, meaning he had the lady concierge so focused on rejecting him she didn’t realize he’d downloaded the whole hotel registry on his cell. If it had been me working at that desk I would have puked all over his phone making his download trick totally useless. Observing the whole scene from afar already had me somewhat nauseous.

The quartet storms in George Best’s room. Traitor Wife is the only one there so they interrogate her. She is going to the opera to deliver the hard disk to the buyer. She doesn’t physically have the drive herself though, Wigless is going to make his appearance with it once the money is handed over. Luckily Traitor Wife is the same dress size as Sam so she can pose as her at the Royal freaking Albert Hall.

They display themselves as follows: Leo stewards in the main stalls, Sam pretends to be an attendee and waits for the buyer, Steve plays tympani in the orchestra (yes, wtf! Talking about being inconspicuous), and Flunkman thank God stays behind guarding Traitor Wife.

The buyer gets there and Sam texts Wigless just as he had instructed Traitor Wife to do. He then communicates her where he and the hard disk are located, in order to get to them, via a number. Of course Sam doesn’t have a clue what that number means and stalls for a second. Buyer gets suspicious and he’s totally on to her. That’s when the most awesome thing happens. While Buyer confronts Sam, Steve tells her to move slightly left when the strings kick in. As she does he shoots some narcotic right into Buyer’s stomach with the drumsticks - from the stage.

Meanwhile Leo figures out the number actually relates to a parking spot underneath the building so he rushes to the garage and sure enough finds Wigless, who is sufficiently quick to hold him at gunpoint. What’s faster then cheetahs Leo??  Steve sneaks off the stage and retrieves the briefcase full of money from under sleeping beauty Buyer’s seat but before heading to the garage he puts something in it. Once Sam joins the party as well Wigless throws her the hard drive and asks for his money. She won’t give it to him (and to be fair she doesn’t even have it), not even when he threatens to kill Leo. Her great excuse is that they have Traitor Wife in custody and she promises they’re going to shoot her if he shoots Leo. Turns out Wigless doesn’t give a fuck about Traitor Wife. She hears that and even sheds a tear.

Right at that moment the best spy on the planet – that’d be Steve – fortunately has a brilliant idea. He’s going to give Wigless the briefcase full of money AND let him keep Leo. Nice plan! No different than what he did to him in Belgrade. BAM, another previous mission reference, this could get juicy. I wonder how Wigless doesn’t figure out they’re planning to play him around. And they surely do. Leo jumps out of the car and a bomb explodes. Deafened by the noise he loudly states Steve finally got his spy legs back. He looks like a 7 year old on his birthday. He’s cute.

Back home Baldie asks if Sam knew there was a bomb in the briefcase when Steve handed it to Wigless. She says yes. Filthy liar. And that’s when all the chickens come home to roost. Leo had questioned the hot couple before: were they hiding their past from one another so they could shelter the agency, like they were stating, or instead in order to protect their shady selves? We are starting to get an answer to that question.

Sam is not sure the pact she made with her husband is a good idea anymore, she’s jealous she didn’t know about Belgrade while Leo did. She feels guilty that they’re not telling each other things about themselves, which is no different than lying. Spot on young lady. She wants to come clean about why she left the agency but Steve stops her mumbling some lame excuse on how he doesn’t want to know it as long as the fact that they wanted to leave a normal life was part of it. You could have come up with something more believable Steve! Of course Sam, being the spy that she is, totally smells the stink and implies that maybe Steve is saying all this because he doesn’t want to let her in HIS past. Steve finds himself stuck in a corner here so he does what every man would have done. He kisses her to shut her mouth. And she does what every woman would have done, she enjoys it. While Steve sneaks a pensive, untrustworthy look behind her back.

Surprisingly this episode ends without sex.